super toilet

December 29, 2008 - We're not sure what it is, but Japanese manufacturer Toto really loves pairing toilets with computer technology. Perhaps its for the purpose of further understanding and refining the art of bowel evacuation, or perhaps the company is plotting for global fecal domination, there is no way to be sure. In either case, Toto is renowned for their Intelligence Toilet, which is capable of measuring your blood pressure, BMI, body weight, and urine sugar in real time as you, well, you know. The original Intelligence Toilet sold over 10,000 units since its 2005 release and had a price tag upwards of $3,500. While 10,000 units may seem like a modest figure for a three year sale period, we are talking about a several thousand dollar crapping system here. However, consumer interest in Japan and the surrounding regions was such that the company is moving forward with the latest iteration in the Intelligence Toilet series, the Intelligence Toilet II.


Details about the latest (and presumably greatest) Intelligence Toilet are sparse, however, the Intelligence Toilet II will boast all of the aforementioned features of its predecessor and a number of helpful extras. Like its predecessor, the Intelligence Toilet II will be able to compile and send its readings to your home PC via a Wi-Fi connection in tidy little graphs and charts, which is both alarming and fascinating at the same time. The newest feature detailed in this week's announcement was a new target audience: women. Redrawing the lines of creepy, the Intelligence Toilet II will apparently be capable of determining basal body temperature and hormone balance, which can aid women in keeping track of their menstrual cycle. Additionally, the Intelligence Toilet II will have a more diet and skin care-centric focus for more mainstream marketability.

How much will this menstrual cycle tracking, fecal matter analyzing, urine temperature determining piece of toilet technology cost you? Unknown. Pricing and availability for the Intelligence Toilet II have yet to be announced, but Toto is reserved about their latest product. The company expects to sell less than half of the amount of Intelligence Toilets sold in a three year period.

Despite meager expectations, the Intelligence Toilet II promises to be the most needlessly advanced toilets on the market.

I want one.

Nonono, I want 5.

I want to erase this topic...

NOOOO, you can't erase my future!!

Maybe more like 12. Buut this is old now.